I Really Wanted a Beer Yesterday....

Man....

I don't know why, but yesterday, I was really craving a beer.

I don't get the cravings that much....since May 9th (67 days ago), I've only had a drink one day. This is the first time in my adult life that I've got this long of a period without drinking. I know this rehab's good for my body.

I'll be 43 next month....and for the last 25 years, I've been drinking regularly. I don't know how I lived through some of those drinking, partying years in college, living in Dallas, Chicago, Kansas City....man....those years are a blur. But I guess I'm not a true alcoholic, or I couldn't go without it. I'd find a way to be drinking.

I think it's good for my body being stuck out here in the country right now, without transportation or an income....or I'd still be getting drunk like a fish every day. I think about my rehab days I'm going through out here....and about how much money people spend to go to a rehab center. I guess when it comes down to it, I'm better financially and health wise being stuck out here.

Thank god I'm vegan....

Tomorrow I go to the dentist to get 2 teeth pulled. Mother and I will be paying my neighbor to drive us 50 miles so I can go to the free dental clinic to get these teeth pulled. I'm not looking forward to it. It'll be the first teeth I've had pulled as an adult. I don't think that's too bad for 43 years....

THE X-RATED GRANDMA aka my Mother: Talking about Shit

52 Days Without a Drink...and Counting....

Well...I still haven't touched a drink.

It's been 52 days now since I've had a drink...and I don't crave it at all...never have....I think that's a good sign.

My brain goes crazy thinking non-stop of all the things I have to do and the projects...it's madness. My brain is always working. It never stops.

For about 50 days now, I can't sleep....I toss and turn, and maybe get about 2 hours of sleep a night....

But I'm getting a lot done....building our YouTube channel, working these projects...the list goes on.

It feels good getting things done....

30 Days without a Drink...and Counting...

Well....the rehab continues here in farm country....

Today makes 30 days without having a drink. I can't remember the last time I've gone more than 30 days with no liquor. I can think of times I've gone 2 or 3 weeks; but never this long.

That's not a good thing. I remember back over the last 25 years of my drinking since I graduated high school in 1983...in the last 25 years, I always remember having a drink....this rehab time out here in the boonies is a much needed time.

It's probably a good thing I'm not in NYC right now for the AMC screening of my film PHONE SEX GRANDMA. If I was there, I'd probably be getting shit-faced with the free booze at the parties. I know this time is a good time for my body.

You'd think with me being vegan and so health-conscious, that I wouldn't drink either, because it pollutes my body. Isn't that something?

These last 4 weeks, I've had so much trouble sleeping too. In the last week, I don't think I've slept a total of 10 hours. I just toss and turn at night, and my mind won't stop working while I'm in bed. These last few days, My head and face has been numb and throbbing a lot. I sometimes have to take aspirin or Benadryl to make myself relax and go to sleep. I wonder if this is a withdrawal symptom from not drinking?

If it is, I just have to have the withdrawals...I'll get through it. I can sleep when I'm dead.

I just have to think of my life, my films, and PHONE SEX GRANDMA:



It makes it all worth it....